*FOR BRITNI*
She sniffled and wiped a tear away as she sat, her back against the door, her knees pulled to her chest.
*One
Doesn't mean anything to me
Come
Show me the meaning of complete*
She chuckled a moment, then began to cry again as this thought entered her head: "I've had my fifteen minutes
of fame. I dated Lance Bass for two years!"
It had been the most incredible two years of her life. No fights, nothing. Then it suddenly ended.
*Where did our love go wrong?
Once we were so strong
How can I go on?*
Britnis mind traveled back to the night she had met him.
Her friend Becca had miraculously met JC at a club in New York City. It had been an immediate attraction between
the two, and they began dating. Two months later, when Becca, obviously lovestruck, introduced JC to Britni, Britni had teased
about JC and Becca hooking her up with Lance, who had always been her favorite *NSYNC member. Becca and JC took her seriously,
and set she and Lance up on a blind date. At first, Lance had been a little hesitant about the set-up, due to the fact that
he was close to 25, and she hadn't even turned 18 yet, but Becca assured him that her friend was very mature for her age.
The first time Britni saw him, her heart nearly stopped. He was wearing black dress pants, a white button-up
shirt, and a brown leather jacket. The black was coming out of his hair, and his eyelids looked a little heavy. He was absolutely
beautiful in her eyes.
*When you told me you loved me
Did you know it would take me the rest of my life
To get over the feeling I know when a dream didn't turn out right*
On Britni's 18th birthday, she and Lance had been dating exactly four months.
She was spending her birthday with him at his house. He was sweet enough to make dinner for her, despite the
fact that he was so nervous, he burnt it.
"Why on earth are you so nervous, Lance?" she asked, running her fingers over his cheek as he complained about
the burnt dinner under his breath. "Whatever it is, you can tell me."
"You may wanna sit down." he said, throwing his dorky little apron onto the kitchen counter. She did, and
he sat in the chair next to her.
"What's up, baby?" she murmured, flipping her long blond hair over her shoulder.
He reached out for her hand, and took it into his. "I know this is gonna sound crazy... but... I love you."
She took a deep breath as she tried to hold in her tears. "Oh, Lance, I loved you the first time I saw you."
And that had completed the first time they had made love. There had been thousands of numerous times after
that, but there had been nothing like the first time; they had both been very delicate with each other. They had both been
chaste.
Britni couldn't remember a time when they hadn't been tender and gentle toward her... except one.
It had been on their one-year anniversary. By then, she had a nice little ranch house in Kentucky, complete
with horses.
As he was out with one of the guys, she sat watching an old *NSYNC concert on TV in the house Lance called
his "second home". A particular song got her mind working. "Space Cowboy". The sight of Lance on the mechanical bull nearly
drove her crazy, for reasons better left to the imagination.
When he returned, the concert was ending. As soon as she saw him walking toward her, she flicked off the TV,
tossed the remote over her shoulder, scrambled off the recliner, and leapt onto him, knocking him to the ground.
"Wow! Somebody's frisky!" His deep voice growled. "Did you see the concert with the mechanical bulls?"
She didn't answer, but said, "How 'bout you be the bull, and I'll be the cowgirl?"
He had agreed to it, and it seemed hours later when he said, "Gee, I didn't know I had that kind of effect
on you."
"Well, you make me whole. You make me feel complete, and when you're not with me, I go crazy." She smiled.
"You effect me that way, too." he admitted.
*When you let me believe
That you were incomplete
Without me by your side*
Britni sobbed as the memories engulfed her. Why did he leave her?
*How could I know
That you would go
That you would run
Baby, I thought you were the one*
It had only been the night before when it had happened.
Lance had arrived at Britni's door, surprising her. She was already in her pajamas.
"Can I come in?" he asked quickly. She nodded, and he followed her inside and to the couch.
"I think it's a stress on our relationship everytime I go on tour." he said.
"Sweetie, you've been on tour, like, four times while we've been dating." She smiled. "It's no big deal."
"The thing is, I'm not spending the right amount of time with you. I'm spending way less than I should. There's
nothing I can do to make up for it." He sighed. "You don't deserve that, Britni. You deserve better. You deserve someone who
can be there for you whenever you need him... And I can't do that."
"So..." She shook her head. "What are you doing?
"Britni... I love you, but I'm breaking up with you." He gulped. "This is goodbye."
*Why
Can't I just leave it all behind
I
Felt passion so bright that I was blind
Then, something made me weak
Talking in my sleep
Baby, I'm in so deep
And you know I believe*
Britni hadn't been able to stop crying since the night before. She hadn't even gone to bed. She just sat in
the same place, not moving.
She didn't understand.
Becca and JC had dated nearly two and a half years, and were engaged, and he never said anything like that
to her the entire time they'd dated.
Lance told Britni he was doing it to prevent her from any future pain. He didn't realize that the future was
now.
She closed her eyes as she thought of him.
*Your lips, your face
Something that time just can't erase
My heart
Could break
All over again*
*NSYNC's first concert of the tour had been in the city where Britni lived.
Joey noticed the pain that filled Lance's face.
"Man, you didn't actually do it, did you?" Joey asked. Lance nodded sadly. "Man, you're not gonna hurt her.
If anything, You're hurting her now!"
"But I don't spend enough time with her. And I can't." Lance said.
"Yes, you can. You can make time." Joey said. "I do that for Kelly and Brianna. You have to make time
for the ones you love. That's the one thing you have to do to keep their love. And you can make time. If you have to, ask
Johnny if you can bring her on the bus. Just, go talk to her, man. The concert's over. Go now."
Britni wiped away another tear. Now he wouldn't know. Lance would never know about her illness. Britni had
a touch of cancer. She had had it as a child, but in the past few months, it had flared up a bit again. There was very little
of it, but the doctor didn't want to risk anything, so he had her on chemotherapy. And now Lance would never know. He had
left her alone... with her memories... and her illness.
*When you told me you loved me
Did you know it would take me the rest of my life
To get over the feeling I know when a dream didn't turn out right
When you let me believe that you were incomplete without you by my side
How could I know that you would go
That you would run
Baby, I thought you were the one*
A knock at the door caused Britni to jump up. She took in a breath and tried to wipe her tears away. She unlocked
the door as she sniffled. She found Lance standing on the doorstep.
"Oh, baby, I was so wrong." he murmured, his deep voice lowering a few notches. "Can you ever forgive me?"
"Oh, Lance." She murmured. "Always." She was prevented from speaking any other words as he kissed her tenderly.
*Baby, I thought you were the one...*